Friday, March 17, 2006

Rock and/or Roll

They put a bunch more dopes in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame the other night. The whole notion of a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame amuses me, one week a year, when they induct somebody. Other than that, I don't care. Billy Joel...Black Sabbath...Elton John...c'mon!

The very idea that something like ROCKNROLL, Little Richard's rock and roll, Chuck Berry's rock and roll, Johnny Rotten's rock and roll, dangerous youth rebellion music, should have something like a hall of fame, and an induction ceremony like they have with their tuxedos at the Waldorf-Astoria, is both endlessly amusing and, in a way, infinitely depressing.

If they have to have a RnR HoF, they should include a primary place for the basics. As the baseball hall of fame counts Babe Ruth and Ty Cobb among its first inductees, the RnR HoF should go something like
Elvis
Beatles
Stones
Velvets/Doors
Led Zep (c'mon, admit it!)
Bowie/(Z)Iggy
Kraftwerk

Where is Kraftwerk? You want a hall of fame, you gotta have Kraftwerk.

Here's what happens if you type "Kraftwerk" into the RnR HoF website's search function:
Sorry, "kraftwerk" yielded no results. Try making your search criteria less specific.
...which is kind of beautiful, appropriate and poetic, in a way.

Is there a "band" that has had more influence on the great music of the last 25 years? In the year 2525, if man is still alive, if woman can survive, they'll buy a robot to bring in da noise, bring in da funk, to bring some humanity into the household, while the humans do the menial repetitive tasks like mopping the (killing) floor and washing the dishes...

...and that robot will be the psychic great-great-grandchild of Kraftwerk's Operator with his Pocket Calculator.

Miles Davis was one of the inductees this week. Good for him. Miles was great -- at jazz. As for his influence on rock music, what's been more relevant to the last 25 years -- Miles' jazz fusion or Kraftwerk's electronic sounds and rhythms? Anyone who voted Miles into the RnR HoF should be strapped down in Guantanamo and force-fed Bitches Brew for the next 12 months. Me, I'll be listening to Trans Europe Express. ROCKANDROLL! HOOTCHIEKOO!

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